food
A Domino’s Store in London Tried to Deliver Pizza to Queen Elizabeth After a Prank Call

A Domino's driver attempted to deliver four cheeseburger pizzas to one Elizabeth, residing in Buckingham Palace, and was surprised to find out someone was pulling his leg. Dude. Come on. Read More >>

food
McDonald’s is Trialling Extended Breakfast Hours and So Help Me if You Don’t Get Your Arse Down There

Miracles happen but once every few thousand years. First, there was that Jesus chap who pulled fish and bread out of his arse (metaphorically speaking) to feed the masses. And now McDonald's is taking up the mantle by serving breakfast until 11am. Read More >>

food
KFC Has Launched a Quorn Imposter Burger for Vegans Right Under the Colonel’s Nose

There's an imposter in the Colonel's ranks and the old fool isn't doing anything about it, which is great news for vegans who want the KF without the C. Read More >>

food
Chemists Promise Breakthrough in Crisp Packet Technology

The difficulties of recycling crisp packets with the metallised films the makers use to keep our sandwich accompaniments fresh could be over soon, thanks to scientists working on new methods of stopping our beloved salty potato products from going soggy. Read More >>

food
Coke and Costa Launch Cold Canned Coffee This Month

They have indeed gone and done it, with the first results of Coca-Cola's acquisition of the Costa Coffee chain hitting the UK later this month. It is three types of coffee in cans from... the... fridge. Read More >>

food
Researchers Use 3D Printed Food to Discover That People Like to Eat Sweet Things to Feel Good

Flying in the face of long-established tradition that sees humans forage for ice cream, sweets, and the odd doughnut when they're feeling gloomy, Lancaster University wants you to taste every bitter defeat. Literally. Read More >>

food
UberEats and McDonald’s Argue Over Who Put Snail in Man’s Burger

Modern man Aiden Griffiths had a modern dinner delivered in modern style by UberEats yesterday, although his comfortable home dining experience was ruined by the discovery of a live snail enjoying the salad part of his delicious burger. Read More >>

food
Mad Scientists Grow Fish on Land

There are large tanks of water involved here too so sorry about that misleading headline, but there is some truth in it as a Scottish fish farm operated by Great British Prawns is about to unleash one million whiteleg shrimp on the UK market -- and they've all been grown in tanks. On land. In a warehouse. Like The Matrix of prawns. Read More >>

food
Morrisons Suggests Biting Heads Off Effigies of the Rich

Supermarket chain Morrisons could find its boardroom staff tried for treason soon, as it has launched a range of gingerbread biscuits fashioned vaguely in the likeness of Prince Harry. The clear inference here is that Morrisons hates the monarchy and would like everyone to eat bits off the prince and immerse him in hot drinks, laughing and torturing the biscuit representation of The Man Who Would Be King if there's a helicopter accident involving the other one. Read More >>

food
Health Lobbyists Demand Plain Packaging for Crisps

Some people sitting in a tank and having a think about health have come up with an entirely predictable idea for how to stop us all getting fatter -- treat junk food in the same way we currently demonise cigarettes, by making the crisps and Kit Kats come in plan packaging. Read More >>

food
Peppa Pig Shamed for Promoting Unhealthy Food to Kids

The commonplace sales tactic of whacking garish pink stuff off the telly onto crappy food stuffs for kids is being highlighted today, with researchers finding that Peppa Pig's face and the characters from whatever the hell Paw Patrol is are your guarantee that the food within has been machine-triple-processed using the finest piles of sugar and salt to the very lowest of nutritional standards. Read More >>

science
White Meat May Be as Bad as Red Meat for Cholesterol

Switching from red meat to chicken to keep your cholesterol down may not be a great strategy, according to a new study this Tuesday. It found that people’s blood cholesterol levels rose similarly when they ate a diet filled with either red or white meat, compared to a diet without meat. This effect on cholesterol, however, may not be as bad for your heart as it seems at first glance. Read More >>

food
Nestle Continues to Distract People From What an Awful Company It Is With Its Awesome Burger

Nestle continues its global do-goodery with its latest veggie burger, which is seemingly a part of its re-brand from morally defunct corporation to "the world's leading Nutrition, Health and Wellness company." Read More >>

food
Waitrose Tests Packaging-Free Rice, Pasta and Beer Vending Machines

Environmentally aware consumers may soon be able to walk out of Waitrose with their pockets full of pasta, cereal, dried beans and rice, thanks to a trial of a packaging-free vending "refillable zone" that does away with the plastic wrapping that makes modern life so crinkly. Read More >>

food
Sainsbury’s New Butcher Stand Has Less Meat Than a Hippy Music Festival

In news that is sure to rile up staunch believers of butchers being sellers and chopper-uppers of animal carcasses, Sainsbury's has announced a popup meatless butchers near one of its London stores. Read More >>