wtf
Monkey Shatters Zoo Glass With Sharpened Stone in Impressive Prison Break Attempt

A video from China is all the proof you need that the hilarious antics of monkeys at the zoo are really just a distracting ruse as they spend their days figuring out the best way to escape. Read More >>

animals
The Monkey From Friends Will Star in Y: The Last Man, Has a Longer and More Varied Career Than Any of Us Ever Will

Get paid, Katie the capuchin. It’s a tough industry out there, for simians or otherwise. Read More >>

science
Tiny Fossil Tooth Found in the Amazon May Have Come From Ancient, Baseball-Size Monkey

In a single tooth, scientists might have discovered the smallest fossil monkey as well as an important piece of primate evolutionary history. Read More >>

science
India’s Monkeys Keep Killing People, So Scientists are Trying Radical New Sterilisation Strategies

One evening last November, a young woman named Neha was feeding her infant son inside their house in Runkata, a small town in the outskirts of Agra, India. Suddenly, a monkey broke into the house, snatched the baby boy from her arms, and made away with him. Neighbours chased the unexpected kidnapper with stones, but to their horror, the baby was soon found lying blood-soaked on a nearby terrace. Despite being rushed to the hospital, Arush, who was just 12 days old, did not survive. Perhaps this sounds like a freak tragedy, a rare case of a wild animal behaving outside its natural order but, truthfully, there was nothing especially rare about this incident. Read More >>

science
Mysterious Origin of Extinct Jamaican Monkey Solved With DNA Testing

For nearly 100 years, scientists haven’t been able to agree on the evolutionary origins of a strange, now-extinct monkey that lived and thrived in Jamaica for thousands of years. New research suggests its ancestors arrived from South America, and that life on this tropical island caused the species to acquire its odd set of features. Read More >>

animals
Belfast Monkey’s Zoobreak Ends in Tragedy

An unnamed spider monkey that broke out of Belfast Zoo enjoyed the free life for just a few short hours, after the animal – unaware of the modern world outside of captivity –was hit by a car on the M2. Read More >>

science
Why Scientists Taught Monkeys to Associate Brand Logos With Genitals

Humans assign value to brands. Brands represent wealth, strength, and yes, sex. We are our brands. And for some rhesus macaques in a lab, one brand, Adidas, represents monkey genitalia. Read More >>

animals
Scottish Zoo Closes Because its Monkeys Are Sad

Dundee's Camperdown wildlife centre is not currently open to welcome your social media content generation field trip, as it's been closed for four days so its monkeys can grieve the death of a member of the pack. Read More >>

animals
Rare Mop-Topped Monkey Spotted in Brazil for First Time in Over 80 Years

It’s been 81 years since anyone has seen a Vanzolini’s bald-faced saki in the wild. On a recent expedition to the Juruá River in the Amazon basin, a group of scientists managed to capture the first photographs ever taken of this elusive primate in its natural habitat—and whoa does it ever look weird. Read More >>

animals
Mischievous Monkey Causes Massive Blackout in Zambian Tourist Town

Around 50,000 residents of Zimbabwe’s Western province were without electricity on Sunday, after a baboon wandered into a power station and fiddled with the equipment. Incredibly, the baboon managed to survive the incident. Read More >>

science
This Monkey Crime Ring Will Hold Your Shit Ransom

Sopranos superfans will be glad to know that the mafia is still alive and well — sort of. A temple in Bali, Indonesia has apparently been overrun by mafioso macaques that have been stealing tourists’ items in exchange for food. New research suggests the unusual phenomenon is a learned behaviour, and goddamn is it a good one. Read More >>

science
Monkeys Learn to Pass a Classic Test For Self-Awareness

The ability to look into a mirror and recognise oneself is a cognitive skill we all take for granted, but very few animals outside of humans are able to do it. New research shows that monkeys can be trained to pass the so-called “mirror test”, suggesting that more species may be self-aware than previously thought. It’s a fascinating result, but one that shows how far we are from being able to accurate gauge consciousness in another animal. Read More >>

aww
Monkeys Grieve When Their Robot Friend Dies

BBC One’s Spy in the Wild series embeds animatronic spy animals out in nature with their real life animal counterparts to see what life is really like in the wild. The robot creatures can look a little bit creepy with their eyeball cameras, but the animals often embrace them as one of their own. Sometimes the relationship can turn emotional, like when these Langur monkeys grieved for a robotic spy monkey that fell to the ground and “died.” Read More >>

animals
Stolen Australian Marmoset Named ‘Gomez’ Still Missing

Three days after burglars stole a family of pygmy marmosets from Symbio Wildlife Park near Sydney, Australia, the eldest marmoset, a 10-year-old male named Gomez, remained missing, Buzzfeed reports. Read More >>

science
Brain Implant Allows Paralysed Monkey to Walk Again

For the first time ever, a neural device has been used to restore locomotion in paralysed primates. It may be years before clinical trials can begin for humans, but this latest breakthrough marks an important step in that direction. Read More >>