russia
Russia Demands Google Cease Sending YouTube Push Notifications for Protest Livestreams

Russia’s Federal Service for Supervision of Communications, Information Technology, and Mass Media (Roskomnadzor) has demanded that Google cease promoting livestreams of demonstrations with push notifications, a day after “tens of thousands” of Russians “staged what observers called the country’s biggest political protest for eight years on Saturday,” Reuters reported. Read More >>

money
Celebratory* Brexit 50p Fast-Tracked into Production

The UK's current government and current chancellor are planning to dump millions of celebratory/commiseratory Brexit 50 pence pieces on the UK, hopefully in time for the current EU exit deadline of October 31. Read More >>

security
Our Dipshit Government is Going After Encrypted Messaging Apps Again

So as of last week we have a new Prime Minister, in the form of Boris Johnson. That means we also have a new government, because a big chunk of the last one resigned in protest over that laughing stock of a man being in charge of the country. But things aren't changing a whole lot. The Brexit situation is still at a standstill, nobody knows what's really going on, and the government still wants to undermine encryption for reasons that still show it doesn't understand a damn thing about technology. Read More >>

politics
Bookmakers Say Nigel Farage Has a 43.5% Chance of Becoming Prime Minister by 2025

It's hard to imagine, but we're now only 94 days away from the worst political crisis since World War 2. And even worse, this time the cause isn't some mischievous Nazis trying to claim squatters rights on Poland - this time, the cause of the problem is... ourselves. Read More >>

politics
Morris Dancers March on Parliament Over May Day Sacrilege

A very polite but irritating protest is about to arrive in Westminster, with an assembled mass of morris dancers planning a little political protest all of their own. The target of their furious bell-waving and non-violent stick-clacking? A change in the timing of the early May bank holiday next year. Read More >>

history
Sometimes Scandal Can Improve a Prospective PM, as Shown by Stanley Baldwin’s School-Time Porn Drama

Stanley Baldwin might not be a name that comes to mind when you think of prime ministers, not like Churchill or Disraeli anyway. Yet Baldwin helped define the interwar period of the 1920s and ‘30s, and proved himself to be one of the most powerful figures in British politics. Baldwin led his party to victory three times, and was even powerful enough to cause Churchill to hesitate to take him on politically.  Read More >>

politics
The Boris Blimp is Going to Take to London’s Skies at Noon Tomorrow

These days if there's a politician you don't like, the popular form of protest is to turn them into a balloon. First was Baby Trump, complete with a tweeting phone, and then some people inflated a giant Sadiq Khan wearing a yellow bikini to a lot less publicity. Recently we heard plans that wannabe Prime Minister and kipper-flapping enthusiast Boris Johnson may get the same treatment. Well, today it's been announced that said balloon will take flight at noon tomorrow. Read More >>

porn
Minister “Extremely Sorry” for Porn Block Delay

About a month ago the government announced that its so-called 'porn block', which was due to come into force by today, was being delayed for an indefinite period of time. The reasoning was that nobody has bothered to tell the EU about the change, and since we're still currently a member of the union we still have to tell it when we're changing the law. Read More >>

health
Government Plans to Make Fat Kids Run Around in Circles More Often

The government has some bad news for that sad sack of flab currently three-screening itself to obesity-related death in front of Netflix, a PS4 and whatever the hell TikTok is when it's at home, as increased funding for in-school and after-school physical education could see the kids of the nation forced to perform one whole hour of exercise-related activity every day. Maybe that huge imposition will finally get the youth to rebel against the political elite. Read More >>

politics
2019’s Next Protest Blimp is Inevitably Boris Johnson

The one-man political Hindenberg that is Boris Johnson is the target of come-lately satirists who've stolen someone else's idea, with a funding plea underway to raise enough money to build a blimp of the already grossly over-inflated and fit-to-burst potential next prime minister. Read More >>

chrome
Chrome Extension Filters Out the Political B-Word

Two app developers have had it with hearing about the dog's dinner of "Brexit" piping out of every news orifice in the land, so have taken direct action to filter out the dread B-word at source. Read More >>

internet
Internet Shutdowns Are Now Just Another Weapon in the Dictator’s Arsenal

Last month, two high-ranking Ethiopian officials were murdered in an attempted coup. The consequences of the murders quickly rippled out into cyberspace, a bloody illustration of the diverging lines between the internet and the physical world. Read More >>

politics
Jeremy Corbyn Wants to Know Who Said He’s Old

World's oldest student Jeremy Corbyn has asked the government's top civil servants to investigate how claims of his frailty came to light, after anonymous tipsters told The Times that he may have to stand down in the near future due to physical and mental health issues. Read More >>

transport
Stowaway Falls from Plane into London Garden

A horrifying reminder of how comparatively lucky we have it was delivered to a garden in Clapham, south London, over the weekend, when a stowaway hiding on the outside of an aeroplane fell as the plane lined up to land at Heathrow. Read More >>

politics
Former Passport Printer Axes 170 Jobs

De La Rue's print factory in Gateshead is performing what it might like us to refer to as a streamlining operation, with 170 jobs about to be lost in a streamline straight to redundancy. De La Rue is best known as the company that used to print our passports, until the government bizarrely handed that job to an overseas provider, because some old people wanted them a colour they imagined to be better. Read More >>